Words of wisdom from a self proclaimed unsuccessful dating professional: DON'T, under any circumstance, trust/believe a married man when he says he's separating from his wife (of 21 years) and in two weeks he wants to come visit you to "explore what's there".
Seriously, can somebody please slap some reality into me? I consider myself to be an intelligent person but when it comes to dating I feel like I am missing some of the higher functioning neural pathways that result in me making decisions that end in the result I am looking for: a healthy, balanced and nourishing relationship.
I recently got off all dating apps and instead have started having date-night with myself which includes eating popcorn and watching videos of Mooji on subjects such as "beyond the concept of aloneness" and "Stop Wasting Time On Nonsense! Just Stay In Your Beingness".
So far, I am finding a pull to go to India and sit with Mooji and also to just sit in silence more and inquire who it is that is wanting all of this... I repeatedly decide against writing many FB posts regarding my dating failures because, well, there have been so many --- and it brings up so much shame for me which is hard to admit and hard to feel. It's been a source of the most grief and sadness in my life and I am still left bewildered by what it is I am missing or not seeing.
To be clear - I am not looking for any advice here, I just wanted to purge some of this energy before 2018. It feels important to express my frustration, sadness, loneliness and confusion about dating and relationships.
I have seriously heard it all. The common sentiments being: it will happen when you're least expecting it, you just need to love yourself more, you're too picky, your standards are too high, you never like the ones that like you, etc....
I honestly think it boils down to alignment. right alignment for the type of partnership I am desiring is calling for me to step into a part of myself that I haven't yet. If I desire a man who has certain qualities then I need to be cultivating those within myself. If there is an ounce of longing in me for another to fill any sort of void, then I know there is more growth for me to do. Even though I thought I had done enough personal growth work to land me a masters in personal growth work, that would make me Emily Lewis, MA, MPG
I am turning ever more inwards and inquiring into what is actually here that is seeing through these eyes. awareness itself. pure spacious presence that requires nothing from life. the suffering all feels really personal in some sense but then when I inquire more deeply and hear the sage wisdom that comes through Mooji, I know deep down that the path of the spiritual seeker is such that the universe is aiding in my release of all attachments, especially this attachment to a partner, the attachment to the fairy tale that isn't happening. all things must be let go of in order to serve highest alignment and this i know to be true.
But it doesn't make it hurt less to the little Emily who wants to be chosen and loved... #redflagsfordating #moojionawakening#whenlifegivesyoulemonsturnthatshitgold #yesthisreallyjusthappenedtome#donedating #awakeningintobeingness
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